okusuck:

IMAGINE IF SIMON COWELL WAS YOUR DAD AND YOU WERE SINGING IN THE SHOWER AND HE KNOCKED ON THE DOOR AND SAID “ITS A NO FROM ME”

(via trust)

lilgremlingirl:

are we gonna fuckn hold hands tonight or what bitch

(Source: bluenude2, via stability)

subwaywhore:

Poking holes in dad’s condoms so someone else can do the dishes

(via hotboyproblems)

cumillionaire:

If my jokes offend you:

  1. I’m sorry
  2. It won’t happen again
  3. 1 & 2 are lies 
  4. You’re a pussy

(Source: 69shadesofgray, via hotboyproblems)